Random thoughts

It is very early, I couldn't sleep. Over the last couple of days I have been to the ear, nose and throat Dr. As well as Pri-med. I've been given four prescriptions (sinus stuff) and one shot in the backside. I couldn't fall asleep last night because of a headache and it woke me again at four am. I can't take my headache medicine because I'm fasting for blood work. I'm telling you all of this because when I woke up this morning not only was I aware of this huge ache in my head but also in there was this chorus floating around. It took me a minute of straining through the headache to figure out the words rolling around in there then I did they went something like this: "How He loves us so, oh how He loves us"

I kind of chuckled thinking it's ironic to be in such incredible pain yet there's God speaking to my heart of His love for me. He wrapped His arms around me and spoke those words to my heart. In the midst of my pain He, like a father, put His arms around me, and said the words each child longs to hear..."I know you're hurting but I love you". Two days ago a friend in my study on prayer commented on a sentence in the book which asked the question, "do you walk around all day with the deep sense of Gods love for you?" (I'm paraphrasing). Now, if you knew something of the last week we've had you might say, like Job's wife, "why don't you just curse God and die?" Ok, I'm being a little dramatic, but we did have several friends with near death emergencies as well as the news that Joes dear step mom is moving into a new stage of cancer. Our hearts are full of the sadness, joys, and brevity and of life on this earth (eternity is not brief but that's another post). Maybe one of the reasons Job didn't curse God, rather choosing to trust Him in the midst of horrible pain, was that he was well aware that God loved Him. I am grateful that God, who in all of His majesty breathed out the stars scattering them across the universe also breathed His whispers of love to my heart.

"All of a sudden, I am unaware of my afflictions by the weight of your glory. And I realize just how beautiful You are and how great your affections for me;oh how He loves us so. How He loves us"

More random thoughts...John, Noble and I are reading, The Mitchell's Five for Victory, a story about a family during WWII. In there story there is a little orphan girl who is eventually reunited with her grandfather. When this happens, Joan Mitchell remarks that "Eunice is no longer an I but now she is a we!" Joan talks about how lonely it must be to be "an I." We immediately thought of our Myra-Frances who, though she doesn't understand yet what it means is a "we" is no longer just "an I". I can't wait for her to discover what it means to be a "we". (although in this house, frankly there can be a little too much we sometimes). The simplified Chinese translation for I Love You is 我爱你....I wonder if God is whispering that to Myra-Frances' heart? (And no, I have not learned Chinese....glorious are the uses of the Internet!)

Random thought three...Sarah just finished reading Gone with the Wind and we were discussing how Scarlet could have had Rhett Butler but kept holding out hope that Ashley loved her. (After watching the movie Sarah was even more shocked! That Scarlett didn't choose Clark Gable!). It is crazy how she help onto little threads of hope of being loved when she could have had all she wanted but was too blind to see it!

I guess these thoughts aren't so random after all, He loves us, oh How He loves us!!!

*The song "How He Loves Us" can be found on iTunes under Me in Motion,

the Lifted up Hands EP